How to Tell Your Boyfriend You Want to Have Sex. by Mc-fly Placide - Musely
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How to Tell Your Boyfriend You Want to Have Sex.

posted in Relationships
12/14/2014
  • 1- Understand your relationship. 
Consider whether you have been in a one-on-one relationship long enough to get to really know each other, and how you two feel about sex.
    1- Understand your relationship.
    Consider whether you have been in a one-on-one relationship long enough to get to really know each other, and how you two feel about sex.
  • -Do you honestly care for and about each other? Do you love him? If you feel the pangs of love (or lust) for each other, it is normal that you may feel like taking the next step and enter into an intimate relationship.
    -Though it’s by no means necessary that two people love each other or be soul mates in order to have sex, bringing sex into the picture can completely change your existing dynamic. Sex is something you should seriously consider before you head down that path.

  • Analyze your motives for having sex. Strip away everything your peers, your favorite celebrities, the media, or even your own boyfriend have told you about having sex and ask yourself what your personal standards are. Do not bow to outside or peer pressure; sex is an act of mutual désire.
    Analyze your motives for having sex. Strip away everything your peers, your favorite celebrities, the media, or even your own boyfriend have told you about having sex and ask yourself what your personal standards are. Do not bow to outside or peer pressure; sex is an act of mutual désire.
  • 2- Decide what kinds of sexual behavior you are ready to explore. The word "sex" covers a lot of territory. Are you interested in sexual intercourse? Oral sex? Mutual masturbation? Determine your boundaries in advance so that, when you do broach the subject with your boyfriend.
    2- Decide what kinds of sexual behavior you are ready to explore. The word "sex" covers a lot of territory. Are you interested in sexual intercourse? Oral sex? Mutual masturbation? Determine your boundaries in advance so that, when you do broach the subject with your boyfriend.
  • You can make sure you’re both on the same page.
    Generally, when you tell somebody you are ready to have sex, this means intercourse. If you want something less than that, be very sure you convey this message before you get started.
    Tell Your Boyfriend You Want to Have Sex Step

  • 3- Determine whether your boyfriend is ready to have sex. Though the stereotype would have us believe that guys are always ready and willing, it may be that your boyfriend needs more time.
    3- Determine whether your boyfriend is ready to have sex. Though the stereotype would have us believe that guys are always ready and willing, it may be that your boyfriend needs more time.
  • If you inform him that you want to have sex and show no consideration for his feelings on the subject, it might put him in a position where he feels like he has to have sex with you to be “manly.”
    It may put him in a position where he feels he can't stay in the relationship. Note: this could happen before or even immediately after you have sex.
    If you feel confident that your boyfriend wants to have sex, it will make talking to him about it much easier and more comfortable.

  • Become more intimate in non-sexual ways. This will help you see how he responds to increased intimacy.
Read his body language. Does he seem comfortable, interested, and eager for more when you are intimate?
    Become more intimate in non-sexual ways. This will help you see how he responds to increased intimacy.
    Read his body language. Does he seem comfortable, interested, and eager for more when you are intimate?
  • Bring up sex in general. Instead of jumping right into the topic of sex between the two of you, discuss how you feel about it, what you both find sexually appealing, etc. This will probably feel really awkward at first, but then again, if you aren’t both ready to talk about sex, you probably aren’t ready to have it, either.

  • 4- Bring up the subject when you two are together in a private setting. Setting the mood with a romantic view, soft lighting, or a glorious makeout session might make the topic easier and more natural to broach.
    4- Bring up the subject when you two are together in a private setting. Setting the mood with a romantic view, soft lighting, or a glorious makeout session might make the topic easier and more natural to broach.
  • Wait until the time is right. If he's having dinner at your house, and you lean over and whisper in his ear that you want to have sex just as your mom asks him to pass the mashed potatoes, he's liable to lose control and burst out with something embarrassing for all, such as "You want to have sex right now?" Awkward!

  • Wait until you're alone together, sharing some personal time. It may or may not be in the middle of a romantic lip lock—it could be over a quiet dinner or walk. Simply tell him what you want. You could be subtle, and say "Honey, I'm ready to take our relationship to the next level," or you could be bold and say "Babe, I want you to make love to me." The nature of your relationship will help you frame your words.

  • If trying to start a conversation about the fact that you want to have sex feels too blunt, try one of the following methods instead:
Ask him if he wants to have sex. This is a good way to not only make it clear that you do, but also determine once and for all whether or not he does.
    If trying to start a conversation about the fact that you want to have sex feels too blunt, try one of the following methods instead:
    Ask him if he wants to have sex. This is a good way to not only make it clear that you do, but also determine once and for all whether or not he does.
  • Don't be too coy at this point. Say, for example, “Babe, I would really like to do it with you. Would you like that?" It's subtle enough not to put him on the spot, but direct enough to make it clear what you want. If he would prefer something different, keep suggesting things that are acceptable
    Don't be too coy at this point. Say, for example, “Babe, I would really like to do it with you. Would you like that?" It's subtle enough not to put him on the spot, but direct enough to make it clear what you want. If he would prefer something different, keep suggesting things that are acceptable
  • Is subtle too indecisive for you? Ask for whatever form of sex you want. For example, “Would you go down on me?” or “Would you like to have sex?” are pretty direct. Since this will put him on the spot, it’s best to use this method only if you are completely confident that your boyfriend also wants to have sex.

  • Physically show him what you want. If you can’t bring yourself to say what’s on your mind, guide his or your hands or body into position. Again, this method is best if you’re confident that he’s on the same page as you.
    Physically show him what you want. If you can’t bring yourself to say what’s on your mind, guide his or your hands or body into position. Again, this method is best if you’re confident that he’s on the same page as you.

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