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How To Resolve A Petty Argument

posted in Family & Kids
12/08/2013
  • Technique #1: The Observer
Imagine yourself as an observer of the argument instead of a participant. Analyze your own position in the argument as if from the outside looking in. Find a room where you can be alone and write a short paragraph expressing each person’s point of view, including your own.
    Technique #1: The Observer
    Imagine yourself as an observer of the argument instead of a participant. Analyze your own position in the argument as if from the outside looking in. Find a room where you can be alone and write a short paragraph expressing each person’s point of view, including your own.
  • Technique #2: The Doppelganger
Temporarily become your opponent. Put yourself in his shoes, internalizing the logic of his argument until you can feel it. If you are unable to create an emotional connection to your opponent’s point of view, at least attempt to supplant your own logic with his.
    Technique #2: The Doppelganger
    Temporarily become your opponent. Put yourself in his shoes, internalizing the logic of his argument until you can feel it. If you are unable to create an emotional connection to your opponent’s point of view, at least attempt to supplant your own logic with his.
  • Technique #3: The Common Thread
You and your opponent may seem to disagree on everything under the sun, but look hard to find an element of the debate you agree upon. See if a solution can be reached that uses common ground as a foundation.
    Technique #3: The Common Thread
    You and your opponent may seem to disagree on everything under the sun, but look hard to find an element of the debate you agree upon. See if a solution can be reached that uses common ground as a foundation.
  • Technique #4: Low Hanging Fruit
 
If you and your opponent have multiple disputes, resolve the easiest ones first. This will build an atmosphere of trust and accomplishment that will help you resolve tougher disputes.
    Technique #4: Low Hanging Fruit

    If you and your opponent have multiple disputes, resolve the easiest ones first. This will build an atmosphere of trust and accomplishment that will help you resolve tougher disputes.
  • Technique #5: The Psychologist
Often in personal relationships people argue about one thing, when the real cause of the argument is some other unspoken thing. If you suspect there is an underlying cause for the argument, you can short-circuit the entire debate by attacking the underlying cause.
    Technique #5: The Psychologist
    Often in personal relationships people argue about one thing, when the real cause of the argument is some other unspoken thing. If you suspect there is an underlying cause for the argument, you can short-circuit the entire debate by attacking the underlying cause.
  • Technique #6: The Robot
If you’re too emotional to work out a solution, try turning your heated emotions completely off (which may take time and distance). The key here is using logic in place of emotion, and it’s a helpful technique when emotion is a significant barrier.
    Technique #6: The Robot
    If you’re too emotional to work out a solution, try turning your heated emotions completely off (which may take time and distance). The key here is using logic in place of emotion, and it’s a helpful technique when emotion is a significant barrier.
  • Technique #7: The Overflowing Cup
If you have a lot of positive history with a person, you may be able to focus on the positive feelings you have for that person instead of the negative feelings associated with this specific dispute. Use those positive feelings as an impetus for a solution.
    Technique #7: The Overflowing Cup
    If you have a lot of positive history with a person, you may be able to focus on the positive feelings you have for that person instead of the negative feelings associated with this specific dispute. Use those positive feelings as an impetus for a solution.

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